Tough Times for a Tough Ol’ Bird

It’s been a tough week for Nancy Pelosi. Tough luck for a tough ol’ gal, tough times for a tough ol’ bird. Rough on the ol’ ruffled feathers, you know. Was it tough enough to coax her into a pleasant retirement? Don’t bet on it! But from the Side I can only say, “Nancy, check it out. Retirement is so fun! And with all that money, and an excellent health plan for life? Why not join the ranks of the retired Dinosaurs, Nancy? You could save yourself from all this shite. And save your party from extinction in the process.”

Even Nancy’s friend, the New York Times, trumpets her defeat to Trump on the Border Bill.

While this article takes her woman-hood head on, claiming Pelosi has “Failed the Women of America” by not condemning Trump for the new sexual assault allegations. And people said I was too tough on shaky Nancy when I suggested the Dems needed to take away her keys. When will the Democrats see the light and let go of Pelosi?

And this super-tough Huff Post headline hollers, “What the hell is Nancy Pelosi Doing?” Man, I’ve been asking that for a long time, though I try to say “heck” usually for the sake of the kids, you know. Pelosi is the dam in the creek, the clog in the artery of democracy. She has her reasons, but no one knows what they are.

But I never said this! Now Vox is telling us that in 2016 Trump ran as a moderate. I see… WTF?? That’s stupid enough to merit a Sideways “Jeez loo-fookin’ wheeze!!” I include this article not because I agree with it, but because I don’t. But, I don’t have a full refutation of it, yet, either. Dang! I will point out that the historic examples are limited and selected. From the Side, I have different take on Trump— that his fascist Reality TV star hypernormalised candidacy put him outside of the ordinary reference scale of the polls this article considered. Trump was neither moderate nor liberal nor conservative. If the polls had a category for “criminal” maybe he would have been more perfectly identified. I don’t buy the argument Vox tries to make here, that moderate candidates necessarily win, especially for President. How’d that work out for Hillary, who certainly didn’t run as any progressive? But I could be wrong; maybe a moderate Dem can win against Trump. Cassandra says, “no”, but what does she know?

We know for sure that moderates can lose, though. So I’ve got an idea. Why don’t the Dems run a real progressive for the first time in a long, long time? As an experiment, you know. Then we might have some idea whether a progressive would stomp Trump like so many of us say they would. Even a progressive woman. Especially a progressive woman! I’m surprised I keep finding Vox arguing from the moderate side. A crisis is no time for moderation! Double-plus un-good on Vox for this one.

Yet another confetti cannon has been uselessly fired in the endlessly looping paper chase I call Clown Wars. A big “pop!” and a cloud of paper explodes, as previously quiet Blue Clown Richard Neal sues for Trump’s tax returns. The Trump Bunker has successfully held off these requests so far. This lawsuit, like all the others, will circle the judicial wheel a few times before it gets to the Supremes. I’ve said more than once, the Supremes are gonna do a pretty groovy little dance number around the phrase “legitimate legislative purpose.” “What,” they’ll sing, “You’re not trying to impeach? Fuggedaboutit!” In five-part harmony. No, I don’t think Neal is going to like how that tune goes.

House Ways and Means Chairman Richard Neal is seeking the President’s tax returns using a little-known IRS provision known as 6103, which allows the Chairmen of the House Ways and Means Committee and the Senate Finance Committee to request and obtain an individual’s tax information for a legitimate legislative purpose.

Oh, lookie here! Maybe DNC might allow a little climate debate to happen after all. How kind of those Machiavellian shite-buckets. They must be sick of the whining of the Climate Kids. And I’m sure they’re hoping they can set the rules so the most qualified climate candidate, Jay Inslee, won’t be part of the climate debate at all. Still, this is a sign that protests can work. A little. Way to go, Climate Kids! Keep fighting for our future. I’m thinkin’ it’s gonna take a lot more of that to get rid of the Dinosaurs. Will there even be a real Climate Candidate in the climate debate? If Inslee’s not there, a climate debate will be a hoax and a joke.

You can tell by the melt-off in Greenland, and by the early, deadly heatwaves in Europe, in India, and now in Alaska. It’s summertime, the livin’s easy, and it’s time for the summer slowdown in the news cycle. They call it the “silly season” for a reason. The Dems are going on vacation until it’s too late for them to impeach. I’m sure a little rest and nap-time will suit Speaker Pelosi well. Because, to Dinosaurs, there’s no action like no action. Hey, no action is better even than slow action, if you’re on the Pelosi-osaurus Path to Extinction.

And I’ll be taking a little vacation from the Side, too, for a few days starting Friday, Independents’ Day, which is my newly-declared holiday on July 5. Independents’ Day celebrates the freedom of all those voters who have thrown off the chains of the Two-Party system and decided to make up their own damn minds about politics. After all, being a newly unaffiliated voter myself, I want to celebrate myself, and my own independence from P.R. Burn-em’s Circus.

I’ll re-post a selection of old columns each day I’m off-line, to Re-View the View from the Side for you. If you haven’t been following this surreal survey of American politics from its inception back in March, the Re-View might help you get a sense of where all this weirdness is coming from. Or, if it confuses you more, well, at least you’ll be used to it when I return next week.

New columns from the Side will start back Monday, July 8.

The only real fun act scheduled for the Circus’ Center Ring will be the Robert Mueller Redux, by popular demand, on July 17. I’ll be getting ready for that one, for sure. Y’all might want to review his little report before then. Summer vacation reading, you know.

So, what does the Side do on vacation? Heck, you know me by now. I’ll be studying hard, catching up on the current state of Hydrology and Entomology, and hopefully examining the population levels of endangered anadromous species in the rivers of Pacific Northwest. Hands-on, if I get lucky!

I’ll get back to you on that on Monday. From the Side.

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